Nearly There Nicely 35

Nearly There Nicely 35

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That night the noxious fumes of nightmares descended upon Will’s dreams.

 

At first, Will was walking on the beach at sunset. The clouds were blocking most of the view, so everything was blue and silver and white. The ocean looked like mercury, it was so clear and bright. It seemed like it’s silver appearance was reflecting so much that the moon would have nothing.

 

Will watched the water on the horizon, feeling the only word bubbling up that needed to be said was “lucid”.

 

At that, he began to walk into the water. First up to his ankles and then to his knees, and then to his hips. When walking forward felt like a chore, Will felt sluggish and cold. But he felt like he still wanted to walk on.

 

Like all dreams, something strange happened. Just when Will thought he saw something on the horizon that he wanted to get to through the water, he was standing on a dock going far out into the water. Will looked down at the water. The reflection of himself was dark. The water’s surface lapped slowly against the beams fifteen feet below him, and beneath it just fell into darkness.

 

Will watched the swirling darkness, wondering if he could make out anything beneath. That’s when he noticed that his hair wasn’t just dark in the reflection, it was black.

 

That’s right. Will thought. I traded it away. For…what? For Crow? Or for myself?

 

Will leaned forward, trying to look at the surface better.

 

Forget it. Worrying about it won’t change a thing. Will told himself. He felt his heart heavy, as if the weight were pulling him down. Will leaned farther forward, closing his eyes. Head-first, Will fell into the icy water, shattering the lazy surface and shooting deeper into the cold depths. Everything just got colder and darker. At one point, Will opened his eyes a bit to see if he could see any light. All that was left above him was a shimmering shadow of the darkening sky.

 

I don’t want to be here. Not anymore. Will closed his eyes, letting himself just fall. What’s the use?

 

Like a bullet, Will shot up suddenly. His eyes and mouth open. It took Will a second to register where he was now. The darkened ceiling, the shape of the room, this was Matéas’s home. With a sigh, Will loosened his shoulders and then rubbed at his eyes. Will looked around the room a moment before getting up. He adjusted his clothes some and then went out into the hallway where Matéas had disappeared into.

 

There wasn’t much to note, unlike the building Nocturne was in. There was no furniture in the hall, just some doors opened, with a few closed, adding up to five total. The last area was dark, looking like a staircase that went down. Will peeked in the open doors, but nothing seemed to be in them. It was just darkness. In the first closed door, it was the same. The second closed door opened to reveal an atrium. Will walked in, finding that under his feet was lush grass. The pillars had vines covering them, and other various plants littered the area so there was no good clear pathway to walk. At the far end was a large Cyprus tree with its canopy rising far above and out of the atrium. Will made his way over to the tree, raising a hand to touch its trunk.

 

“Don’t.” Will jerked his hand back and turned around, seeing Matéas standing at the doorway. He walked toward Will and the tree. “You seem to have slept unwell.”

 

Will frowned a bit. “What, can’t you see my dreams, too?”

 

Matéas snickered, “No, but wouldn’t that be a grand thing.” Will’s eyes matched a glare onto the god, which only made his smile widen. “I cannot enter your dreams unless you invite me. Such is the way of the Blessing.” Will looked away from him and back to the tree. “Breathtaking, no?” He nodded. “I planted this tree only a hundred years ago, and yet from the energy here it has flourished and grown huge.”

 

“Energy?”

 

“Like Black, the Threshold has its own sense of energy. No sun, or stars, but its clouds and oceans and winds still circulate. If any plants grow it’s due to an unseen energy.”

 

“Like what?” Will asked, turning to look at him.

 

“A person wanting to see it.” Matéas answered. “I wanted to see this grow, and it has. People who want to see something, it shall appear. To some, it may be just a mirage but to others it is as sturdy as a century-old tree.”

 

Will turned to look back at the tree itself. “I had a nightmare, but somehow… Looking at this tree, I feel like it was a long time ago.”

 

“Feelings of peace and contentment are the Threshold’s unique poison.”

 

Will thought a moment, and then looked to Matéas. “Poison?”

 

He just shrugged and started to walk away. He pointed to one of the pillars, and next to it appeared a plain door. “If you understand that much, then walk through the door.”

 

-----

 

Crow had walked through the city, returned to the alley where the door to Nocturne once was. He kicked the brick with annoyance seeing there no doorway.

 

“What the hell? You call me back and then shut the damn door in my face.” Crow cursed, turning to walk away. “Fine, I won’t do your fucking chores anymore.”

 

He stopped, turning to look as a light appeared behind him. The door had reappeared in a flashy ball of light. Crow chuckled a bit, walking to it. “Flashy.” He pulled open the door and walked through, shutting it behind him.

 

Crow was inside at the storefront. He looked around briefly, then walked toward the backdoor. He waved at Dove sitting on the ground playing with a yo-yo. “What’s that?”

 

“Achilles’s Thread of Life.” She answered, spinning it around. “So strong, and yet such a short Thread.”

 

“You actually believe in that crap? It’s probably some manufactured piece of his soul or some shit.” Crow rolled his eyes.

 

“That’s why it’s called a ‘Thread’, moron.” Dove glared up to him. Crow pouted some, glaring back, but it was anger. “Did you lose your precious little escape rope?” She asked in a high tone meant to annoy him.

 

Crow gritted his teeth. “What’s it to you? You’re a content little bitch running around serving a god.”

 

“I’ve made peace with it.” Dove answered, looking back to the yo-yo. “Unlike you. You act like a caged animal, fierce and without direction.”

 

Crow kicked the wall next to her, but Dove didn’t flinch. “I’m not a fucking animal.”

 

“Said the beast to the sea.” Dove answered as Crow yanked open the backdoor and stormed through it, slamming it shut behind him.

 

Crow walked down the hallway into the kitchen, flopping into one of the chairs at the table. He spotted Isaac in the kitchen making a sandwich.

 

“How the fuck can you be so content!?” Crow shouted all of a sudden, making the blond jump.

 

Isaac stared at Crow a moment then tilted his head with a frown, “What’s got you so ticked off?”

 

Crow groaned, sulking into the chair. “This, Isaac. This. Serving a jerk of a god, and then… dammit, he has to drag Will into this insanity, too!”

 

Isaac shrugged, starting to work on his sandwich some more. “It can’t be helped. Will was involved the moment his father came here.”

 

“Yeah, but why the hell would he want to forget his wife in the first place? Don’t you wanna remember the woman you loved so much?” Crow asked, frustrated.

 

Isaac was quiet. He came over and sat across from Crow with his sandwich. He began to fiddle with the edges of the bread as Crow watched. “Love and memories are a funny thing.” He paused, “Sometimes, it’s all you can do to remember. And, if all you’re remembering is the beauty of someone you loved, well then… I can understand wanting to forget that. The more you remember them, the more you miss them. I suppose that’s a reason for suicide…”

 

Crow looked down to the sandwich, feeling some of his anger dissipate. “I guess… I just can’t relate.”

 

“What if Will died?” Crow snapped his head up, looking across at the blue eyes that were focused on the bread before him. “If he died, how would you feel? Would it be enough that you’d just want to forget ever meeting him? Enough to make you want to die, too?”

 

Crow looked away to the floor. “Why use him as the example?”

 

“Because you don’t give a rat’s ass about your father. Not right now, at least.”

 

“Hah!” Crow laughed, leaning onto the table. “And you think I ever will?”

 

Isaac nodded. “To you, he’s someone very important. If he wasn’t why else would you be avoiding him?”

 

“I’m not avoiding him!” Crow shouted.

 

Akiio came walking in from the hallway, “Ran away from home.”

 

“To the far north.” Isaac added. “All to get away from him. That’s quite a large impact.”

 

“I just…” Crow shook his head, leaning back. “I didn’t wanna see his ugly mug anymore- and if I had stayed- he would’ve ragged on me about being a knight and some shit.”

 

Akiio sat between the two at the table, looking to Isaac first and then to Crow. Isaac finally took a bite out of his sandwich. There was silence for a moment before Isaac asked his next question.

 

“Wasn’t there something you wanted to protect?”

 

“Huh?” Crow looked up to Isaac.

 

“Wasn’t there something, or someone, that you wanted to protect?” Isaac asked again.

 

Crow looked down to the table, thinking in silence.

 

“You don’t care anymore?” Isaac asked softly.

 

“He cares.” Akiio interjected when Crow looked up to reply. “One mistake does not make you worthless.”

 

Crow sat back, feeling himself laugh. First it was a soft laugh, and then it just came out like a train wreck. Crow just laughed and laughed, and laughed. Isaac and Akiio watched in silence. Crow was still laughing when Isaac had finished eating and left the room. A few moments later, Akiio stood up to leave.

 

Akiio stopped at the doorway, turning to say to Crow, “To him, you have worth.”

 

Crow stopped laughing a moment after Akiio left, it just quieting down and fading into the silence. “To him?” Crow chuckled, shifting to stand up. “Yeah, right.” He jerked his head with a smile of his face, laughing at that thought.

 

Of course. It was there all along. To Will I have worth. What a piece of total bullshit.

 

A voice echoed heavy in Crow’s heart, piercing him and making his body numb. And yet, you believe such frivolity.

 

Crow gritted his teeth glaring straight ahead of him. Get. Out. Of. My. Head.